My husband and I adopted a Great Dane from a local Dane rescue just under two years ago now, and it’s been a fun and challenging journey. Ever since we adopted her and she’s traveled with us, gone out in public with us, etc. I’ve felt compelled to write about the things people say when you own a Great Dane – mostly because I stand there confused with a blank stare. My favorite is when we’re walking and people in cars actually stop or slow way down, to gawk. They draw a lot of commentary from toddlers to the elderly, regularly – so here it goes.

• GASP! That dog is huge.
• Oh. My. God. Look at that dog.
• Mommy, mommy! Big doggy! Big Doggy!
• Whoa.
• Holy Shit, honey! Look at that dog, babe, you’ve gotta come look at this dog!
• How much does that thing eat?
• Is that a Dalmatian? Ummmm, nope.
• [Solicitors walking by] Is that the house with the crazy barking dog?
• Is she nice?
• Is she harlequin? No, she’s Merle. Aren’t they the same? Clearly not.
• [Neighbor to neighbor across the street] – oh, your little dog is fired up because a huge, massive dog walked by [pointing] see, down the street? I can hear you.
• Can I pet your dog?
• What kind of dog is that? Great Dane. Oh, so big, so big, so scary. ???
• She’s soooooo pretty.
• Wow, drool!
• I heard your dog barking when I rang the doorbell, is it safe to go in the backyard?
• Does she eat off the counter?
• I always wanted a Great Dane.
• Wow, you could put a saddle on that horse and ride her! (what?)
• How much does she weigh?
• Does she have her own couch?
• My neighbor used to have a Great Dane, so neat!
• My neighbors Great Dane ate someone’s pet hamster.
• Is that a Mastiff?! No, she’s a Great Dane. Oh, well, basically the same thing! Nope.
• My toddler could ride her! (WTF NO. DOGS AREN’T FOR RIDING. EVER.).

There are more, I just can’t think of them right now…meet Venus, she may not have her own couch but she has her own chair and she’s really good at side-eye: